回复：【转】当小清新的句孑翻译成英文再翻译回来时

余忆童稚时，能张目对日，明察秋毫，见藐小微物，必细察其纹理，故时有物外之趣。夏蚊成雷，私拟作群鹤舞空。心之所向，则或千或百果然鹤也。昂首观之，项为之强。又留蚊于素帐中，徐喷以烟，使其冲烟飞鸣，作青云白鹤观，果如鹤唳云端，怡然称快。于土墙凹凸处，花台小草丛杂处，常蹲其身，使与台齐；定神细视，以丛草为林，以虫蚁为兽，以土砾凸者为丘，凹者为壑，神游其中，怡然自得。一日见二虫斗草间，观之正浓，忽有庞然大物拔山倒树而来，盖一癞虾蟆也，舌一吐而二虫尽为所吞。余年幼方出神，不觉呀然惊恐。神定，捉虾蟆，鞭数十，驱之别院。

中译英 Yu Yi childish, can open one's eyes on, enough to see tiny micro objects, must scrutinize its texture, so when things interesting outside. Summer mosquito into REM, the private group intended for free. Where the heart is, or it is 100 thousand or crane. View of the head, is strong. And the mosquito in account, Xu spray to smoke, so that red smoke forma for Albatron crane concept, Guo Ruhe Li clouds, contented with. On the convex and concave wall, Huatai grass motley, often squat body, make and neat; dingshen as fine, with a tuft of grass for the forest, to ants for beast, with gravel convex mound, concave gully, Fugue which, happy and pleased with oneself. Growing a second worm fighting grass, the view is strong, suddenly a monster Nukiyama come down the tree, cover a toad also tongue a spit to make the best of the two worms swallow. More young side with, not sleep ah but panic. God, catch frog, whip dozens, drive the other hospital.

余忆童稚时，能张目，足以见藐小微物，必细察其纹理，故时有物外之趣。夏蚊成雷，用于免费的私人集团。心在哪里，或是10万或起重机。头的观点，强。在帐户的蚊子，徐喷以烟，使红烟上青云白鹤观， 果如鹤唳云端，满足。在凸和凹壁，华泰草斑驳，经常蹲下身子，使整洁；定神细视，以丛草为林，以蚂蚁为兽，碎石凸丘，凹沟，神游其中，怡然自得。生长第二虫斗草，观强，突然一个怪物拔山倒树而来， 盖一癞蛤蟆也舌头一吐最好两虫吞。更年轻的球队，不睡觉啊，但是恐慌。上帝，抓青蛙，鞭数十， 带动其他医院。
（不行大半夜我笑成狗了）

旧的思维，两虫斗，不是强奸盖。俗话说：“奸近杀昆虫，反之亦然？对于职业的附件，为蚯蚓卵（吴哈杨说，被人们称为蛋）不会肿。赶鸭子的嘴巴，甚至移动，鸭脖子使英国吞形，害怕得哭了起来，语言处理。这也是你的童年。
（英gay兰表示莫名躺枪）

接着是陈太丘与友♂妻

　　陈太丘与友期行，期日中，过中不至，太丘舍去，去后乃至。 元方时年七岁，门外戏。客问元方：“尊君在不？”答曰：“待君久不至，已去。”友人便怒：“非人哉！与人期行，相委而去。”元方曰：“君与家君期日中。日中不至，则是无信；对子骂父，则是无礼。” 友人惭，下车引之，元方入门不顾。
Chen Taiqiu and friends for the period, not to live in, too Qiushe to go after, and. Yuan Fang at the age of seven, outside the play. The guest asks: "monarch in Yuan Fang?" Answer: "not long to wait you, have to." Friends will anger: "inhuman"! And for phase to commission." Yuan Fang said: "Jun and Jiajun date in. To date, there is no letter; on call father, is rude." Friends can get off, lead, Yuan Fang, regardless of entry.
陈太丘和朋友的期间，不住，太qiushe走后，和。元芳在七岁的时候，在玩。客人问：“元芳君？”回答：“等你，不长了。”朋友会愤怒：“非人”！和相委。”元芳说：“君和嘉俊约会。到目前为止，没有信；在给父亲打电话，是不礼貌的。“朋友可以下车，铅， 元芳，无论入境。
（狄仁杰：元芳你为何这么屌 ）

然而我看不懂文言文和英文

下一首：两小二变日

孔子东游，见两小儿辩日，问其故。(辩日 一作：辩斗)
一儿曰：“我以日始出时去人近，而日中时远也。”
一儿以日初出远，而日中时近也。
一儿曰：“日初出大如车盖，及日中则如盘盂，此不为远者小而近者大乎？”
一儿曰：“日初出沧沧凉凉，及其日中如探汤，此不为近者热而远者凉乎？”
孔子不能决也。
两小儿笑曰：“孰为汝多知乎？”
Kong Zi Dong You, see the two children arguing, so. One child said: "I to go out one day, while Japan is also the time away." A child to the beginning of a day, and when Japan is also near. One child said: "the beginning of the day, such as a large hood, and Japan is like the Pan Yu, who is not much for small and large?" One child said: "the sun is cold cool, such as Japan and into the soup, this is not nearly as hot and cold far?" Kong Zi must not have. Two children laughed and said: "what you know?"

孔子东游，见两小儿辩，所以。一个孩子说：“我要出去一天，而日本时远也。”一个孩子一天的开始，当日本也在附近。一个孩子说：“一天的开始，如大罩，和日本就像泛游，人不多的小的和大的？”一个孩子说：“太阳是冷凉，如日本，入汤， 这是几乎没有冷热远吗？”孔子不能有。两个孩子笑着说：“你知道什么

接下来是史诗大作：出湿婊

宫中府中，俱为一体，陟罚臧否，不宜异同。若有作奸犯科及为忠善者，宜付有司论其刑赏，以昭陛下平明之理，不宜偏私，使内外异法也。
The palace in the house, all for one, reward and punishment, not similarities and differences. If a commit crimes and good for loyalty, should pay our on the reward and punishment, to witness your majesty of dawn, unfavorable favoritism, differences within and outside the law also.
房子里的宫殿，所有的人，奖励和惩罚，不宜异同。如果一个犯罪和良好的忠诚度，要我们在奖励和惩罚，以昭陛下黎明，不宜偏私，内部和外部的法律也有差异。

侍中侍郎郭攸之、费祎、董允等，此皆良实，志虑忠纯，是以先帝简拔以遗陛下。愚以为宫中之事，事无大小，悉以咨之，然后施行，必能裨补阙漏，有所广益。
Sijung assistant minister Guo Youzhi, Fei Yi and Dong Yun, this is good, volunteers were loyal pure, is the first emperor to select and promote your majesty. I think that the palace of things, everything, big and small, to the client note, then the implementation will Bibu que leak, somewhat guangyi.
侍中侍郎郭攸之、费祎董允，这是好的，志虑忠纯，是以简拔陛下第一个皇帝。我想的事情，一切的宫殿，大和小，悉以咨之，然后实施，必能裨补阙漏，有所广益。
（居然完美的翻译出来了，不高兴）

亲贤臣，远小人，此先汉所以兴隆也；亲小人，远贤臣，此后汉所以倾颓也。先帝在时，每与臣论此事，未尝不叹息痛恨于桓、灵也。侍中、尚书、长史、参军，此悉贞良死节之臣，愿陛下亲之信之，则汉室之隆，可计日而待也。
Pro Xian Chen, far villain, Xinglong is also the first Chinese so far; Pro villain, Xian Chen, since Chinese are so left leaning. The first emperor, each with the minister on this issue, not sigh hate Yu Huan, spirit. Sijung, Shangshu, long history, to join the army, this learns Zhen Liang section of the minister, may your kiss of the Han Dynasty, is long, also on the question of dollars.
亲西安的陈，远小人，兴隆也是中国第一个为止；亲小人，陈西安，此后汉所以倾颓。第一个皇帝，都对这一问题的部长，未尝不叹息痛恨于桓、灵。侍中、尚书、长史、参军，此悉贞亮节的部长，可能你的吻的汉代，长，也对美元的问题。
（有谁姓陈吗）